第33章 带子:我并不想相亲1

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    宇智波带子的清晨是从自家老妈的“责骂声”中开始的……
    “太阳都晒屁股了,还不起床!”
    “叫你几遍了,赶紧起来了!”
    “只刷牙不洗脸?没见过你这么脏的女孩子!”
    “吃饭就好好吃,不要在饭桌上玩手机!”
    “不许剩,盛给你的东西都必须好好吃完!”
    “反正你在家没事,待会把家里稍微收拾下……”
    “妈!”宇智波带子放下手机,一脸沉痛地开口,“我输了,说吧,你想让我做什么?”
    带子妈顿时恢复了以往的和善脸孔,微笑着说:“那你看我昨晚跟你说的app?”
    “下!马上就下!”
    “哦,那你什么时候用呢?”
    “……后天?”
    “……”盯——————
    “明天,明天可以了吧!”宇智波带子泪流满面,“今天公会有团队boss战,我真的没时间!明天我一定用,你相信我!”
    “真的?”
    “真的!”
    “绝对?”
    “绝对!”
    “宇智波带子。”
    “在!”
    带子妈面带微笑却用犀利的目光注视着自家女儿,柔声细语地说道:“我还可以相信你最后一次,对吧?”
    宇智波带子:“……”呵……呵呵……我敢说“不对”吗?她抽搐嘴角,试图撒娇,“妈,你可以更信任我一点的~”
    带子妈表情沉痛地说道:“我试过了。你毕业后选择在家工作,我催促过你出去工作吗?”
    “没有……”宇智波带子默默望天,亲爹亲妈的确都挺厚道的,对她这种为很多人不能理解的行为十分支持,并且非常大气地表示“就算你一辈子家里蹲也没事,我们活着会养你,死后会留下遗产养你”。
    但是!
    还是会让她找男朋友……
    理由是不能每天呆在家里不和外人接触,得偶尔见见男人,吸阳补阴才能活得久……这是什么奇怪的说法啊?
    但是,其实她知道的,爸爸和妈妈只是怕他们未来某天离开后没人继续照顾她,其实也没有催得很厉害或者非让她嫁人。只是也强调说,至少该给她自己和别人一个机会,整天闷在家里不出去,那不是什么机会都没有了吗?
    只是她现阶段对此也的确没什么兴趣就是了,毕竟……
    是小说不好看了,还是游戏不好玩了?
    纸片人老公不香吗?
    为什么一定要找现实中的对象啊……
    恰在此时,带子妈又问:“你喜欢买你那些纸片人老公相关的奇怪小册子和小人,我阻止过吗?”
    “没有……”宇智波带子捂脸,嗨呀,被老妈看到自己买的小本子什么的……其实挺尴尬的,不过随着这类书越来越多,她实在找不到地方藏,也只能大大方方地摆在卧室的书架上了。
    “你熬夜通宵打游戏的时候,我骂过你吗?”
    “没有……”
    甚至还会做好吃的给她补身体……
    “那么,带子,乖女儿,来,告诉我,你是怎么回报妈妈我的?”
    “……”
    也、也就是每次信誓旦旦地说要和谁谁见面但之后都没去嘛……
    真是的……
    她长长叹了口气,举起右手郑重发誓:“妈妈,我向你保证——这一次,绝对是真的!”
    带子妈不为所动,如此说道:“拿你最爱的红豆糕发誓,如果撒谎,这辈子吃到的红豆糕都是坏的。”
    “……太狠了吧?”
    “发不发?”
    “……发啦!”
    不过本来宇智波带子这次也的确没想过撒谎,所以还是顺利地发誓过了关。吃完早餐回屋后,她也的确用手机下载了那个app。
    根据老妈的说法,这个app是木叶上层为了解决近年来“大龄青年越来越多,新生儿越来越少”的情况而自主开发的,目前甚至还没正式命名,也还属于限量下载内部测试阶段。她能拿到下载码,纯靠爹妈的面子——虽然她完全不想要就是了……
    app的图标是个简单的木叶标志——内含漩涡的树叶,主色调是绿色的。
    宇智波带子:“……”emmmm你一个相亲app选择绿色作为主色调,这真的没问题吗?不是在暗示什么吧?
    她随即打开了app,开始填写各种个人资料。
    这些资料必须全部真实,不能有半点虚假,因为之后会有专门的工作人员对此来进行审核,以确保“匹配结果”正确无误。毫无疑问,这是个大工程,不过,她也从中看出了木叶上层“做红娘的决心”。
    “姓名……宇智波带子……”
    “性别……女……”
    “年龄……24岁……”
    “工作……啃老……嗯?怎么没啃老……哦,有了,待业青年……
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