第六十四章红颜祸水惊四方
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苏小北带着一个小美女回来的消息迅速便在小村子传开,一些打着光棍的年轻人,都挤在牛大宝的门前想看一看这个被称作“小仙女”的女人。牛大宝赶了好多次,都没有驱散,索性也就随了他们。
牛大宝让老婆给陈灵儿收拾屋子,自己则拉着苏小北走到外面,问道:“这是啥情况?不是说去请孙赶超去的嘛,咋就又带回一个小丫头片子。你家亲戚?”
苏小北无奈道:“狗屁亲戚,领导的亲戚。我也是被逼上梁山没了办法。我跟你说,你可得让婶子给看好了,出了问题,我们可都不好交代。”
牛大宝“呸”了一声,说:“俺不管,谁招来的谁来看,现在事都忙不过来,哪有空给人看孩子。”
苏小北耍赖道:“你不管也得管。咋滴你难道要俺一个老爷们天天围着一个小丫头片子转?我告诉你,你要是不答应,我就撤了答应给你扩建的资金。”
牛大宝一听急了眼,骂道:“他娘的,你小子咋也学会耍无赖了。”
苏小北就问:“你到底答不答应?”
牛大宝一跺脚,哼了一声算是同意。
正在这时,牛磊换慌慌张张从门外跑进来,推开门便与陈灵儿来了个面对面,陈灵儿对她笑了一下,他瞬间便魂飞魄散,一下蹲到地上,嘴里小声的来回嘟囔着一句话:“俺滴娘唉,俺滴娘唉......”
陈灵儿看到牛磊失魂落魄的样子,一下子笑了起来,那笑声如银铃一般,震得刚还魂的牛磊马上又魂不守舍了。
牛大宝一把将牛磊拖到外面,骂道:“没出息的家伙。”
哪成想牛磊还没有反映过来,咧着嘴傻笑,然后竟又作了一首自以为很绝妙的打油诗:“今日碰得仙女下凡,定是神仙给俺牵缘。取了婆姨再打江山,生堆娃娃围着俺转。”
牛大宝被苏小北摆了一刀,现在又听牛磊张嘴飚诗,顿时气得火冒三丈,抄起棍子就打。谁知打了几下,牛磊竟没有反应,慢吞吞站起来盯着自己看了一眼,然后又向苏小北走去。
牛大宝被他这莫名奇妙的举动吓得连连后退,以为给牛磊打出了毛病。
苏小北也给吓了一跳,这么猛的打几下,竟没有反应,这脑子是不是被打坏了。正想着问几句时,牛磊突然扑通一声跪在苏小北面前,苏小北被吓的直接跳了起来。
牛磊也不在乎,失魂落魄词不达意的说:“哥,你是俺亲爹。不对,爹,你是俺亲哥。也不对......”牛磊在纠结着怎么表达。
苏小北实在有些看不下去,就问他:“你到底要说啥?”
牛磊又使劲晃了晃脑袋,这才稍微清醒的说:“苏书记,俺没想到你真的是说到做到,俺代表俺死去的爹谢谢你。”说着经磕起头来。
“不是,这都啥跟啥。”苏小北猛地跳开,然后从侧面一把拉起正磕的上瘾的牛磊问道:“我说啥了?”
牛磊说:“你说给俺找一个城里姑娘,比嫂子还漂亮,比嫂子还水灵。俺以为你逗俺玩的,没想到你真的给找来了。”
苏小北这才及其上次让他帮忙许给他的事情,可是这哪跟哪啊,天上的星星也能摘得?于是忙说:“你搞错了,这不是......”
哪知还没有说完,牛磊便猛地站起身朝着外面跑去,边跑边喊:“俺找到媳妇了......”
苏小北被牛磊的操作惊得目瞪口呆,心想这不就是现实版的范进中举吗?只不过人家是真的考上了举人,而他是自以为是的得了一个美娇娘。
牛大宝老脸臊的一阵骚红,喊着:“真是没脸见人了。”
苏小北说:“快去追啊!”
......
就这样在村子里折腾了一个多小时,才把疯疯癫癫的牛磊给扛了回来。李勇笑着说:“叔,这是娶不着媳妇给想疯了。癞蛤蟆都想吃天鹅肉了。”
牛大宝怒道:“你才是癞蛤蟆。”一句话怼的李勇说不出话来。
王永言在一旁打了一杯水,递给牛大宝说:“红颜祸水啊。这女的来了,咱们村怕是不好过了。咱们可千万不能学周幽王烽火戏诸侯啊。”
苏小北没好气道:“这都是啥跟啥,咋就又整出周幽王来了。我告诉你们,她就是县里安排来的农业技术员。你们以后都尊重着点,看好了,千万别让她出事。少一根头发,咱的日子都不好过。”
王永言说:“俺不管,俺要是天天看着她,就俺那媳妇非把俺给揍出屎来。”
李勇噗嗤一声笑了出来。
王永言瞥了他一眼,说:“你懂个屁,俺这是尊重。”
李勇忙应承道:“对对对,可不是吨重吗,得有一吨重。”
王永言没听出这谐音梗,苏小北却哈哈哈笑了起来。
晚上吃饭时,牛磊让老婆端几个菜给陈灵儿送到房间里,免得牛磊看到又犯病。可是,还没有出门,陈灵儿便蹦蹦跳跳的来了
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