第153章 凡哥除了生孩子,还有什么不会啊!那姐又要作妖!

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    陈凡不屑地撇了撇嘴,转过头看向小宇和另外两个同样是选秀出身,没背景的新人女孩小雨和小雪。
    “发什么愣?”陈凡拿起自己的蛇皮袋,往肩膀上一扛,“在这屋里闻这群寄生虫的臭气能填饱肚子吗?拿上你们的钱,跟我走。”
    小宇抹了一把眼角的泪水,用力地点了点头,紧紧跟在陈凡身后。小雨和小雪对视一眼,也毫不犹豫地转身,逃离了这个让人窒息的修罗场。
    大门砰的一声关上。
    别墅里,留下了气急败坏的老油条们,对着空荡荡的院子无能狂怒。
    ……
    离开桃花坞别墅后,陈凡领着三个新人,沿着村里蜿蜒的水泥路,直奔桃花村的中心大集。
    今天是农历逢五,正是桃花村半个月一次的大集日子。
    还没走近,一股浓郁到化不开的烟火气便扑面而来。
    街边摆满了五颜六色的雨棚,此起彼伏的叫卖声,柴油三轮车的突突声,活鸡活鸭的扑腾声交织在一起,构成了一首充满生命力的人间交响乐。
    空气中弥漫着炸油条的香味,刚从地里拔出来的泥土腥味,以及肉摊上混合着八角桂皮的卤香味。
    这里没有聚光灯,没有红地毯,只有最真实,最粗粝的芸芸众生。
    小宇和两个女孩站在集市入口,看着手里皱巴巴的五十元纸币,脸上露出了茫然无措的表情。
    在他们原本被公司包装好的世界里,一顿减脂餐都要上百块,五十块钱,在这人声鼎沸的集市里,真的能买到足够四个人吃一天的食物吗?
    “陈凡哥……”小宇咽了口唾沫,小声问道,“这钱……咱们该怎么花啊?这点钱,估计连半只鸡都买不到吧?”
    陈凡停下脚步,转过头看着这三个满脸写着“不食人间烟火”的娱乐圈新人。
    他随手将那个破旧的蛇皮袋扔在地上,嘴角勾起一抹自信到极点的弧度:“在商场里,五十块钱只配买杯带冰块的糖水。但在这种大集上,只要你懂得规矩……”
    陈凡指了指自己的脑袋:“五十块钱,老子能让你们吃得比过年还丰盛!”
    “看好了,今天教官给你们上的第一课,叫人间烟火。”
    话音刚落,陈凡宛如一条回归大海的蛟龙,大步流星地扎进了拥挤的集市人潮中。
    他并没有急着去那些摆在显眼位置的摊铺,而是带着小宇他们穿过喧闹的主街,来到了集市角落里一个卖活禽的摊位前。
    摊主是个满脸皱纹的本地阿公,正蹲在地上抽着旱烟,面前的笼子里关着十几只毛色发亮的走地土鸡。
    小宇他们还没反应过来,陈凡已经蹲了下去,动作熟练地从笼子里薅出一只芦花鸡,掂了掂分量,又翻开鸡翅膀看了看底下的绒毛。
    “阿公,侬这鸡爪子皮都发黄了,骨架子这么轻,毛还这么糙,这分明是下蛋下得快绝经的老母鸡啊,咋卖的?”
    陈凡开口的一瞬间,直接把身后的三个新人震得外焦里嫩!
    这口音!
    这语调!
    这竟然是纯正到不能再纯正的江南吴侬软语方言!
    阿公一听是本地口音,顿时放下旱烟袋,笑眯眯地用方言回敬:“小伙子,侬勿要瞎讲讲!我这是正宗的散养土鸡,天天在后山吃虫子的!一口价,八十块一只,不还价的呀!”
    “八十?阿公你这是抢劫啊!”
    陈凡毫不客气地把鸡扔回笼子里,拍了拍手上的鸡毛,拉着小宇就走:“最多五十!多一分老子都去隔壁买那家的鸭子了!这鸡炖汤都嫌柴!”
    “哎哎哎!别走啊小伙子!”阿公急了,连忙站起来招手,“六十!六十拿走!大家都是乡里乡亲的,我亏本卖给你啦!”
    陈凡停下脚步,转过身,伸出五根手指,眼神坚定如铁,语气中透着一股斩钉截铁的市井霸气:
    “五十块!我不仅要这只鸡,你还得帮我杀好,褪毛,剁成块。顺便,你那案板旁边那两块生姜和那把小葱,得给我当搭头白饶了!”
    “这……”阿公满脸肉痛,看着陈凡那副“不卖拉倒”的架势,最终只能无奈地叹了口气,一拍大腿,“算了算了,今天刚开张,就当交个朋友了!五十就五十,拿去拿去!”
    成交!
    小宇,小雨和小雪站在原地,眼珠子都快瞪出来了!
    八十块钱的土鸡,被硬生生砍到了五十块!而且还包杀包切,甚至还白嫖了葱和姜!
    这行云流水的砍价操作,这拿捏人心的拉扯技巧,简直比他们在表演课上学的那些理论知识还要震撼一百倍!
    直播间里的弹幕再次迎来了核爆般的刷屏:
    【卧槽!!!凡哥还会说方言?!这口音也太地道了吧!】
    【神特么绝经的老母鸡!凡哥这找茬的角度绝了,伤害性不大,侮辱性极强!】
    【五十块钱拿下一只活鸡加葱姜
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