2020.7.12
顶点小说(dingdian666.com)更新快，无弹窗！
亲亲爱爱的小番茄
有些打脸因为好像隔了很久没有给我家可爱温柔的小番茄写东西了，其实每天也会有些想法想要记下来，但都忍不住在即将睡觉的时候打电话讲给你而且好像最近莫名其妙与你有一种疏远感（这个词貌似不太恰当因为以偶的文学功底似乎无法概括这种感觉），感觉你在微信上和我讲话对你来说没有以前那么轻松自在。不过我也明白这都是我自己一个人加戏产生的错觉，所以你放心，我会不断通过批评与自我批评，理论联系实际，打消这些可能都因为异地而产生的坏念头。
比如说昨天还在问你万一以后你对我的感觉变淡了怎么办，今天，不对，准确地说是昨天给你讲完电话后就明白这样的担心都是深井冰行为。今天早上就明白以后不能想这些并打算把这全部心理过程都记录下来。没想到下午有幸能和你讲出来，所以也就没有写，不过...重点要来了
那就是今天又惹小番茄生气啦，呜呜
这样似乎感觉偶每次只有惹你不开心的时候才会跑来记小本本...
不过这都是有感而发啦
总结一下下午的冒失行为就是：不能总试图把我认为的好告诉你让你那么做其实最后让你生气的那句话应该是“我不会对你有什么想法”。真是有够自作多情，触到了你那种不想理会别人的看法或者说这样告诉你好像是在打消你的不安全感，其实是强调了那种偏见。呜，总是后知后觉...不过学习也是需要犯错的嘛
其实我一开始就知道要避开某种话题，但我仿佛是不撞南墙不回头的那种。这下好了，南墙有多硬撞了才知道，好痛...
所以再一次收获恋爱心得，哪壶不开就不要提。不能自以为是的讲看起来安慰人的话，要先想想它有没有很适合小番茄。
其实每次生气我真的比你还难过，因为生气久了就会累积到失望。不过你要想想看，我怎么舍得让小番茄不开心呢？每天逗你笑还来不及呢。so，那些让你不开心的行为可能因为不了解，或是异地交流障碍，或是词不达意，种种原因吧，但绝对没有半点故意去伤害你，反而可能是因为太在乎而想面面俱到，所以你每次生气我都尽量将它转变为好的积累，就是让你更加了解我，了解我的爱。
还是觉得自己好差劲，下午本来好好的聊天，让我一句话破坏了所有，真的好像我就是根搅屎棍，要么好心办坏事，要么让坏事更坏，这可能也是我的缺点吧。也希望小番茄可以包容，哪怕是耐心一点告诉我该怎么做，我悟性这么高，当然回乖乖学好啦。
小番茄今天也很棒，生气好像没有那么冲动，没有真的把我拉黑，这也让我觉得小番茄好爱我，一切都是我不好，呜~
另外，拉黑这样的行为真的会让我很伤心喔，如果有一天你气到抓狂那就试试，我会有多伤心，这应该比狠话狠十倍吧，而且很作，很很作，慎用~
接下来就是祈祷下周可以顺利和小番茄见面，把这些心里话讲给你听，再抱着你转圈圈，一切的一切都因和你在一起而变得幸福。
想你，晚安~mua~
247days，哪壶不开就不提~
刚刚合上了笔和本，依然感觉意犹未尽，于是再次打开，再次告诉你，同时告诉我自己我爱你
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