第7章 老师难当,蠢猴难教
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“观音夜入菩提房,最后小脸通红的出去,这究竟是道德的沦丧,还是人性的悲哀,请看三界快报!”
天庭之中,玉帝偷窥完斜月三星洞中的场景后,满脸笑意的想到。
“是该办个八卦报,赚点小钱钱,充实一下自己的金库了啊。”
但是,玉帝转念一想,这报一出,半个天庭估计要打没了,于是,只好收了这个念头,陷入了莫名的惆怅。
一晃又是六七载而过,魏风和孙悟空已经在这三星洞中,打杂了六七年了。
当然,某只穿山甲打杂不便,于是菩提祖师见状,还贴心的教了魏风化形术。
一想到此处,魏风就觉妖生黑暗啊。
“这日子不挺好的嘛。”
孙悟空看着魏风惆怅的样子,满不在乎的说道。
“呵呵,你这蠢猴安知穿山甲之志哉!”
魏风看着这死猴子,越来越发福的身材,瞬间气就不打一处来。
不过有一说一啊,这洞府内,伙食确实挺好的,魏风摸了摸,他越发圆润的肚子。
毕竟,他居然就靠伙食,硬生生的就吃进了太乙真仙境。
当然,点开系统面板一看,再往后突破需要的能量点,也多的让人发狂。
此时面板数据为:
宿主:魏风
形态:化人形中(穿山甲)
境界:太乙真仙一层(6583246/1亿)
至于,资源搜索界面啥的,魏风也就只能看看,流流口水了。
虽说那上面灵光闪闪,资源众多,尤其是洞中,资源宝库内的东西。
但是,谁他喵的,敢在菩提祖师头上动土呢?
“难啊~”
念及此处,魏风又是一声感叹。
而这时,菩提祖师估摸着时间,觉得也差不多了,学费也没几年了。
于是,就打算传点真本事,给魏风和孙悟空,好让他们学完之后,早点滚蛋。
毕竟,这两破妖是真能吃啊,他要了好几倍的伙食费,细细一算,竟是,差点让他们吃回本了。
尤其是那只穿山甲,肚子跟个无底洞一样,匡匡炫,不都说成仙之后,就不用进食了么?
为啥这两妖却是修为越高,吃的越多!
哎,硬是逼得他还专门规定了吃饭的时间,除正常吃饭时间之外,不允许其它时间,再去食堂进食。
想到此处,菩提祖师就有些欲哭无泪。
“难道我对如来下手轻了?伙食费要少了?”
“不过,常理来说,应该也够了吧!为此,如来和观音都差点翻脸了。”
“要不得了啊,还是早点教完,打发它们下山吧。”
思索了许久的菩提祖师,犹豫了又犹豫之后,还是觉得,早点打发下山,这一途径最为稳妥。
于是,次日便是召集了众位徒弟,开起了晨会。
美名其曰,叫做考察学习,进展大会。实则却是,菩提祖师准备着,怎么来给魏风和孙悟空开个小灶。
一通流程过后,菩提祖师便是来到了魏风和孙悟空的身边,开口问道。
“尔等,来我洞中已有几年?”
魏风见状,瞬间明白,正事儿要来了,直接抢答道:
“启禀师傅,我等来此,约莫已有七年了。”
菩提祖师一听,满意的点了点头道:
“既然已有七年了,那便教你们一些东西吧。”
“我‘道’字门中有三百六十旁门,旁门皆有正果。不知你们愿学哪一门?”
魏风还在思索,原著怎么回的,结果,就听见一旁的孙悟空瞬间答道:
“师傅,弟子愿意都学,都学!”
菩提祖师一听,瞬间打趣道:
“‘道’者,不可贪多,你且听我缓缓道来,你再选择。”
“我有‘术’字门道法一本,可让你请仙扶鸾,问卜揲箸,亦可知趋吉避凶之理。你可愿学?”
“愿学,愿学,弟子愿学!”
孙悟空欣喜的回答道。
“你且不急,且听我继续说。”
“我有‘流’字门道法一本,可让你熟知百家经典,或看经,或念佛,并朝真降圣之类。你可愿学?”
“愿学,愿学,弟子愿学!”
孙悟空又面带笑容的回应道。
……
菩提祖师一时语塞,竟不知如何继续下去了。
“好家伙,什么杂七杂八的,你都要学,我还怎么给你开小灶?没脑筋的玩意儿。”
“难道,真的跟传闻说的一样,被旁边这只穿山甲,啃坏了脑袋?”
想到此处,菩提祖师面带异样的,扫视了一眼魏风。
魏风瞬间心中大警,顿觉不妙。
虽说不知道,菩提祖师这异样的眼神是何意思,但是他知道,剧情歪了,从猴子这儿开始的。
于是,立马一脚
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